I was conducting a session last week with a group of emerging salespeople. They have sales experience, but are not yet sales superstars.
As we discussed various issues, a common theme kept arising. They were concerned that some of the questions and/or statements I was suggesting might offend the prospect or make the prospect feel uncomfortable.
What it told me was that many of the salespeople in that group have what
Dave Kurlan would call a Need for Approval. This occurs when a salesperson's desire to be liked by the prospect is more important than making the sale. A a result, the salesperson avoids asking tough questions that may lead to confrontation, rejection or "no." This can lead to "constipation of the pipeline" - there are prospects in the pipeline but very few of them are closed or eliminated.
Now, I am not advocating that salespeople be rude or be an SOB. Rather, I think that it is critical that we do the right things, including asking questions to determine (1) if the prospect has a problem that needs to be addressed and (2) if the prospect wants your help in fixing it. Sometimes those questions are tough. Sometimes those questions "take the prospect where he does not want to go." But it is only through questioning that you and the prospect will be able to jointly answer #1 and #2.
Professionals like attorneys, CPAs, bankers will ask tough questions because they know that unless they have all the information, they cannot be effective. Salespeople need to adopt the same attitude.